Throw back to 2013

saw this, looked fun

right now… The children are off to school.  Grace packed origami paper and rainbow loom bands for the times she has nothing to do. I have dishes to do from last night, we had company and then went to bed so it's saved for me…just as soon as I am done here :)

Thinking…about Dani's talk.  She sent it to me this morning and I enjoyed reading it so much.  She is an amazing woman, I am so happy to have raised daughters that are so much better than their mother in so many ways.

Feeling… kind of tired, time change week is always annoying…why do we still do it?? 

Reading… Allegiant, but it's going slowly because so is Hannah and we are sharing one book and she usually has it and Jane Eyre.

Excited…About so many things.  This Friday I start horse back riding lessons! In April we are going on a cruise! counting down to that!! Holidays! Fun times!

Wondering…  how to raise the children the best we can (always)

Working…on house projects.  I have several in the works and need to get my buns in gear.

Proud…  of my husband.  He is searching for greater truth and light with honesty and passion.  His plane is doing well, their weapons systems are proving quite effective (as per the news updates)

Wanting…a date night

Stressed…about making Christmas lovely and affordable

Wishing...the family all lived close together.

Missing… Penny and Tate.  They should live by their grandma. 

Eating…  too much

Drinking… diet coke, water

Watching… Bones, NCIS, later this week Enders Game!

Loving… the beautiful fall colors and leaves.  The crisp air, pumpkin everything season.

2020

right now… Ethan and I are laying on the bed, and face timing Hannah and Sawyer.  Hannah is working on a banner.

Thinking…about going to the airport in an hour and a half to pick up Val and Ryan!!

Feeling… Excited.  And tired.  It's 9:21PM and I have been up since 5:15AM

Reading…The City Farm and The Wolf Wilder.  I like them both.  Dani, Jenna and I are in a book group with the Blacks and Holly picked The City Farm.

Excited…to go to DisneyWorld tomorrow, to babysit the Brandts next week, and for Ethan's mission call.

Wondering…  where he will go??

Working…improving my prayers.

Proud…  Ethan and his many college acceptances and scholarships and most of all that he's going on a mission. 

Wanting…to live close to all my children and grandchildren.

Stressed…all the kids killing themselves and being depressed (at work)

Wishing...the family all lived close together.

Missing… Penny and Tate and Marshall, Cora and Ruby and Ezra.  They should live by their Mimi. 

Eating…  too much

Drinking… diet coke, water

Watching… Seal Team, NCIS, Blue Bloods

Loving…the perfect Florida winter weather

Nothing to see here

Just a picture of my precious grandson doing science. I can’t wait to see him next week.

Work was good, except our school secretary is leaving and I really like her:( It’s a good move for her though, and I am happy for her.

After work I did some tidying. Rob did some fishing. Grace did some banding.

Tonight Val and Ryan fly in. They are going on a cruise on Saturday and came a day early to spend the day with us! Can’t wait!!

We also heard from Nana and Abba who are on their 3 week trip to Australia, New Zealand and Tasmania. They are having a a great time and their pictures looked awesome.

Arnold Palmer

Grace, Ava, Phoebe, Bianca and Tyler

The band does many fundraisers. One is running a concession stand at the Arnold Palmer Invitational Golf Tournament. We were not able to take a lot of shifts, and I would have liked to help more, but today I took off work early and Sierra and Grace and I went. It was not hard or too busy and hopefully we’ll make $150-200 toward band fees.

Taco Tuesday

We are working on mission papers for Ethan. Boy oh boy what an exciting time. And how joyful and terrifying at the same time. I love this boy so stinkin much.

Tonight we had 2 sets of elders over for taco Tuesday. It was yummy and they were nice. Ethan left with them after. He often goes out with them, and plays basketball with them when it’s their p- day. He enjoys both;)

nature vs nurture and the power of a parents words

I don't know if it's every family but in our family we spend a fair amount of time comparing ourselves to one another.  We have regular conversations about who is smartest, tallest, fastest, most like our dad, biggest adventurer, thinnest, etc.  Ok to be fair it's mostly me and two of my sisters but to some extent all of us.  Do all families do that? 
Anna is, unanimously agreed upon, the smartest.  I am definitely on the bottom, or 2nd from the bottom rung.  This is not said with any kind of malice.  We weigh that the same as who is tallest.  (Michael for the boys, Val for the girls).  It's just a fact, and the truth is we are all smart enough, and  we define smart as apparent IQ + academic success which is no measure of success or happiness or talent etc.


So this weekend we had a new truth come to light.  To refresh, Mom is Russian and  Dad is French/Basque.  Some time ago Alec had a DNA test done, as is all the rage, and he is, no surprise Russian and French/Basque and some small percent random other things.  Anna just had her DNA done and got the results last week.  Her's came back a surprising Russian, Swedish, German and some random things.  Hmmm.


Fast forward 3 days, I got a phone call at 10pm.  That's late for my early-bird self and my sisters know this. It was Val and Anna group facetiming and they insisted that I get up and turn on the light, so I did.  Anna begins and tells the story of the test and how she then called mom and dad and they didn't fess up at first, but then they did.  Turns out, they said, that they were once young and newly married and starting their family.  They had me and Alec, a boy and a girl .  Dad thought they were done, and I guess mom agreed, although she always wanted a dozen kids.  Two makes sense, and dad being an immigrant, and having grown up very poor probably really wanted to provide financial security (that's my commentary). So Dad had a vasectomy and that was that....until.


One year later they joined the church and their world changed.  They became new in Christ and their perspectives and practices and principles all changed.  They now wanted a larger family, they now understood their eternal roles as mother and father, they now were disciples in every sense of the word.  So off dad went to the doctor to reverse what turned out to be a hasty decision. Well it was the 70's and this was new and what was done couldn't be undone. 


Undeterred they began to pursue adoption and then they learned about sperm donation and added that to their quest to grow their family. Do you see where this story is going?

Soon they had success and added Michael to the family, via donor.  Then Val and finally Anna.  Then they adopted Sarika, Andrea and Emily.  Our family was complete. I suppose the years rolled by and they were busy raising their family and I guess they never gave it another thought because however we got here we were theirs, and each others.


Secrets are impossible to keep in this new century.  And maybe they shouldn't be kept anyway. And now their 45 year old private decision is public.


So to say that we were shocked,that I was shocked, would be a mild choice of words.  I could not believe it. CRAZY!


I am not mad, just super surprised.  Super. Surprised. Different kids in the family responded different ways.  Everyone was shocked and surprised ..except Michael who said that years ago he knew his blood type didn't match and that he couldn't be genetically related to both of them but he figured it didn't matter so he went on with his life.  (what??)  Anna was immediately contacted thru ancestry by some half-sisters who share a donor with her. hello? what! so crazy!! It turns out that her donor has 40 children out there (so far) and they have reunions with him and each other.  He's got a PhD in astrophysics and is a musician and does photography.  Her halfs look just like her (weird) and are all engineers and doctors and what not. I am super curious to learn what other similarities she has with them.  Obviously they were each raised in their own families and with different backgrounds and dynamics and relationships...but they share some DNA and what does that mean? Nature vs Nurture, what an opportunity to see it in action.


I wonder what Val and Michael will find out.


Also one other life lesson.  What your parents tell you is the gospel truth to you.  And is so important.  So Val also has an unmatched blood type.  Which we knew.  And we spent a lot of time drawing the little square and trying to figure out how it happened.  In the end mom said she was her daughter and we kind of assumed that science somehow didn't apply to this case. duh  Maybe Michael is the smartest of the bunch after all :).  Anyway we are smart, educated, people who totally believed that somehow, in this case, science didn't work.  Imagine kids who have parents who tell them that they are awful or ugly or bad.  They would believe that on a deep level.  Or parents who teach their kids that sin is okay, or alternate lifestyles are fine.  How do you reconcile that?  If we believed science didn't apply to us what else could parents convince their children of?  Be careful with your words moms and dads and self.

Weeks end

Written on Monday. How is it that now that my children are almost grown I’m even busier?
Friday we had a college fair at school. It was great. There were tons of colleges, the armed forces, study abroads and even a coupe gap year programs there. I collected pens, which I enjoyed getting and then showing to Ethan and Sierra when we all got home.

The girls went house shopping and found a house that was just my style! 

Friday night was, what turned out to be the last, basketball game of the season. Rob and I went. Our team lost. It is always fun to watch the band. 

The young women had their fundraiser on Saturday. It was an all day affair of prepping, executing and cleaning up but it went great. Everyone had a fabulous time. We had plenty of food and made almost all the money we needed!

Sunday night we watched “The Count Of Monte Cristo” because Ethan had just read the book. I had not read the book or seen the movie, Sierra read and saw before.  Anyway I liked it. 

Ai yi yi

What a week...and it’s only Wednesday Thursday. Our school is a hotbed of problems. We had another suicide on Tuesday. It hit the kids and the adults hard. It was a girl this time, a senior, a frequent flyer of the guidance office. She was troubled but getting help. Suicide is such a tragic waste. It is very draining to work in guidance at times of crisis. There are many tears and troubles that come our way. I do what I can to make sure they are seen quickly, treated kindly, and that I always give a hug and a warm smile (not a joyful jubilant one but a “you are safe, we’ve got you” one). For the counselors it’s way worse. We try to keep a cheerful face, and then at the end of the day we give each other a hug and an “are you okay” then we leave and go home to our families, and our dogs, and our everything else.

Working at the school this year has been eye opening. Shocking and sad in some ways. Every good, and every bad, thing you can imagine is there.

Today NaQuanda and I were twinning! She’s one of my favs!

Last night Ella and Madison planned Minute to Win it games for our combined activity. After we stayed and had a meeting with the bishopric and yw presidency. We really want to seek the Lord’s counsel and do what we can to help our precious youth navigate life’s treacherous waters.

Lincoln went to the groomer today.  Also Sierra, Grace and I took Kit to the doll hospital to be repaired.

One legged Kit wheeling off to become a new woman.

In other news the world is being rocked with the corona virus.
Ethan got accepted into another college.
Grace’s pain has been high this week :(
Ziva is Anorexic, she won’t eat. Dumb dog.
Today while I was driving home a saw a 5 footer sunning itself on the side of a pond across the street from the school. 🐊.
We’ve had some cooler weather.
I made Shepard’s pie for dinner yesterday and it was good.
Nana and Abba are in Australia, which is fun!
Sierra and I went to training for next week's Arnold Palmer Golf Tournament. (we are working for a band fundraiser)
The boys won another basketball game (that the band played at), so we move on to another game on Friday.
And I need more hours in my day!