35

 Today is Dani’s birthday! She’s 35 years old. This girl made me a mom on a hot august afternoon a long time ago and I have been grateful and delighted every day since. Dani is lots of fun! She’s an awesome big sister, auntie, mom, daughter, wife and person. I admire her and love her and am so glad she is my daughter! 💕💕

98 degrees

 Here’s a picture of my cute hubby. He’s working hard in MD.

Meanwhile we are playing hard here in FL. Tonight boy band 98 degrees was playing at Epcot. Becca got a huge group together and we braved rain and crowds to go.

This is some of us. Becca, Kristi, Nicole, Michelle, Camille, Alecia, Annette, Jill, Julie, Katty, Kayla and I went.

It was super fun. They were awesome! And the company was even better.  Camille had never ridden Space Ship Earth so we did that and then headed home.

In other news Grace’s random bleeding has started back. We are going to a dermatologist on Thursday, and also seeming her GI on Wednesday so I will ask both of them about it. It’s seriously the craziest thing. With no injury or warning she just starts to bleed. Sometimes on her leg, or her hand, or her arm or really where ever. Then it stops and she has little pin prick bruises.   Little Job has had enough. I wish I could make it all stop.

Saturday

We had a planning meeting at the Bishop’s house today. It’s always a great time at the Blacks. We grilled, played, and planned.

 Grace had band practice. 

In no particular order…

Apparently my photos are loading willy nilly tonight. It’s been a good couple of days. Yesterday we took dinner to a couple in our ward. He was in a motorcycle accident but will be fine. 

Today was busier than is typical for me lately. I met Becca at Typhoon Lagoon and we floated the lazy river for a few hours. That was lots of fun. 

It’s been very, very rainy and stormy the past few nights. Last week the first football game was postponed. It looked like tonight’s game was going to be also. It was delayed but eventually they played. It rained on us and the metal bleachers made everyone’s bottoms wet but we won! And the band played! So fun times. 

Kristina is taking care of two orphan baby squirrels. I went over after the game and we fed them and visited. So fun!

 

AnimaL woes

Cayley and Ethan have a little dog named Twinkie. They stayed with Grace last week and in trade Twinkie is staying with us this week. They definitely got the better end of the deal as Miss Twinkie is barky, and I have to keep her with me because she’s not trustworthy and I have to cook for her twice a day because she doesn’t eat dog food. I am theoretically always happy to help but sometimes the practice is not as happy. She’s okay though.

Luka has another bladder issue. We took him to the vet where we learned nothing, he said either he has stones, or he has a UTI or he has a condition where he stress pees blood. So he got an antibiotic shot, and some special food. 

For YW tonight we had a stress night. We made stress balls, and did some meditation and made smoothies. Only Charlotte and Lettie came but it was still fun. One or many it’s still worth the effort. 
 

And in Grace news 1. She really likes her therapist and is already seeing improvements! Thank goodness!! Seriously that is an answer to prayer! 2. She and Blake are dating, which is exciting. Your first boyfriend is always exciting. They’ve been friends all through high school, he’s in band too, and he’s a really nice guy. 

Tuesday

This cutest baby in the world wore her first ponytail today!

We had our first pep rally of the year. It was stormy so it was moved inside the gym, which was actually quite nice. And it was lots of fun to hear the pep tunes again!

Diana and I went to the movies today to see Mack & Rita. It was okay, kind of like Big but not as funny. Anyway we both agreed that it was good for a one time viewing on a discount Tuesday. 

 This is me 🤣 The funny thing is that I think everyone feels like this all the time. When I was in high school I remember feeling like I had a lot going on -lots of classes, seminary, after school job, all the teenage things.

When I was a young mom I felt like I had lots of things to juggle- babies, doing daycare, going to college, a calling, family, housekeeping, disappointing husband.

When I was a single mom I felt like I had lots of things to do- work, the girls, finishing college, callings, dating (or not dating depending) 

You get the picture. No matter what phase of life you are in it always feels like there is a lot going on. In retrospect some of the old challenges seem like they should have been easier, some seem like “wow that was really hard I never want to do that again”. The thing is it was a challenge at the time, and that’s something to remember. Everyone has lots of challenges in their lives and it doesn’t matter if someone’s challenge seems like it would be easy for you, or super hard. Either way our job is to help and lift each other and show each other grace…and show ourselves grace. 

Like all the other phases of life this one also feels like a lot sometimes. Ironically if you had asked 40 year old me, or 20 year old me what life would have been like now I would have thought it would have been easier, more figured out! 

Turns out 54 year old me knows, and has known for a while that life doesn’t get easier. It gets different and there are different joys and different struggles but there are always both. 

So right now I’m working on keeping my particular set of balls in the air, not dropping any, and hoping it all goes as “planned”.

A little mission update:

As his mission draws to a close I miss him more and more. People always say to me “Ethan’s mission is going so fast! I’m sure it’s not to you but for me it seems so crazy that he’s been gone four months, six months, a year, or whatever amount of time it’s been. Up until now I’ve agreed that it has gone fast. Now that the end is nearing I’m really looking forward to his return. 

I think at the beginning it was so surreal. I have always wanted to be a missionary. One of my biggest regrets is that I didn’t serve a mission as a youth. I wanted to but got side tracked and while I do not regret at all my beautiful children or being a mom, that is my greatest joy. I do often think of that mission that I didn’t go on, and I am deeply regretful. So I look forward to Rob and I serving and when I had a son I looked forward to him serving. Like Hannah of old when I held my baby boy in my arms I promised I would do all I could to help him grow into a godly man, a disciple of Jesus Christ, and a missionary. We were very focused on that during his growing up. When he went it was a huge “huzzah!” and I was way more happy than I was sad about him leaving me. 

The whole time he’s been happily serving and I’ve been happily reading his weekly emails and of course I’ve missed him, and of course it’s been hard for him and not all rainbows and puppies but it’s been good. Really good.

Now he’s almost done, now we almost get him back, now the wait is a little harder and the anticipation is a little stronger. 

We have 2 1/2 months left (and I really mean “we”, it is his mission but any mom or dad of a missionary knows it’s a we mission too) and I can hardly wait!

These awesome letters help though💕

This week we had the first ever Mission leadership conference in the North Mission and also the first ever zone conference. We all learned a lot from these experiences.

In zone conference me and my companion worked with some missionaries from the other zone in Madrid to make a 40 minute presentation on charity, the pure love of Christ. Our "training" went pretty well but in the prep time that we put in I learned so much. One quote I just loved from a talk titled 'Missionaries Are a Treasure of the Church' reads:

"Your message is a message of love, a message of hope, and a message of faith. Your attitude and your actions invite the Spirit, and the Spirit enables us to understand the things that are important. What I want to convey to you is that through your love, you are imparting the love of God."

What greater joy can we have the feeling the Love of God for other people and helping them feel it. It reminds me of christmas when I was maybe 8 or 9. I was running errands with my mom and we were at bath and body works. I found this monstrously gaudy, pink, light up, bedazzled, eifel tower shaped hand sanitizer case. My sister at the time was studying french in school and we must have been in that stage of life where having cool hand sanitizer bottles was really quite important in day to day life. I immediately knew I wanted to get this for my sister for Christmas. I told my mom and I'm pretty sure I didn't even end up paying for it. This ugly $7 piece of rubber is the first gift I remember "buying" for someone else totally on my own accord. I remember being so excited to give it to her that I almost coudn't wait til Christmas but I wrapped it up, and I'm sure that probably meant I stopped bouncing off the walls for 30 seconds to give my mom a piece of tape while I watched her wrap it up, and then it made it's way under the tree. Christmas morning my greatest motivator to wake up and get down to the presents was that my sister could open this awesome gift I had gotten her. I wasn't worried about anything I got or even other stuff she or any of my other sisters got. I just wanted her to open that darned hand sanitizer case. And I was soooo happy when she did. Probably more than she was. Now I don't remember perfect, but I'm sure I ran right over and told her to press the button so the LED lights could test whether or not you had epilepsy, and to show my sister how cool her present was. I have no idea if she liked the case or even remembers this but I experienced the joy of giving for the first time here. Giving>>>>>>>>

What I want to convey to you is that as we do things motivated by a love for others we can help them feel both our love and the love of God for them and that nothing else will enfuse quite as much joy into the world as that.

 

Home

Emma got up super early to drive me to the airport. We took the scenic route and I was so grateful that she was willing to take me.

Despite our detour I made it on time and had a safe flight. When I sat down and buckled up…and after the doors were closed, the pilot got on welcomed everyone to the flight and then said don’t expect snacks or to take your seatbelt off, we are expecting some “light chop” on the entire flight. 🤦🏽‍♀️

While I was gone I got several really fun pictures from other band moms. This one was from the first pep rally. The one below is from senior portrait day.

I’ve traded bed partners for the next few weeks. I miss Rob when we are apart but I’m proud of him and the good work he’s doing. 

 Sometimes photos pop up on fb, which I love. This is one! 

Also for my SoMD friends, we are building at Porto Bello Estates near Flat Iron Farm AND even though we will be in different wards  I’m totally willing to drive to Salsas any time:) or to your house for book club:) I’m excited to reconnect with everyone. 

Lastly here’s a quote I loved today by Erin Napier, 

“As humans we wish we could do it all, see it all, be anything we want to be… But it’s not possible,” she wrote. “Time is short and we are too flawed and regular to do and to have every thing we want. We have to figure out that thing God wants us to focus on, say “yes” to that road and forget all the other roads. Give that everything we’ve got. And that’s the only way we can make a real difference in the world, by carving that uniquely ‘you’ shaped path into the earth that it was missing.”

Saturday

Today was such a fun day! We went to the book store and then to Cheesecake Factory. 

Ezra enjoyed the book store and spent his time running amuck!

We played a game, swam, had dinner together and watched “Cars”. 

 

Boonshoft

This is seriously one of my favorite children’s museums. It’s so much fun and so well done.

Ezra had 5 adults chasing him around. You’d think that would have been pretty good odds but Ezra won:) He’s a ball of energy!

 

In the afternoon there was swimming and in the evening there was porch sitting. It was a great day.

Travel

 Ezra and Hannah flew to Ohio today. Rob and I are driving there. We will have two fun days to play!! Can’t wait!

Today is Tatum’s 13th birthday! She is an amazing young woman. She seems so much more grown up this last year.

I listened to a wonderful podcast today on Psalm 51 and it’s perspective on repentance. Several things really stood out to me. This quote: “As a General Authority, I have preparedness’s  information for the First Presidency to use in considering applications to readmit repentant transgressors into the Church and to restore priesthood and temple blessings. Many times a bishop will write, "I feel he has suffered enough!" But suffering is not repentance. Suffering comes from lack of complete repentance. A stake president will write, "I feel he has been punished enough!" But punishment is not repentance. Punishment follows disobedience and precedes repentance. A husband will write, "My wife has confessed everything!" But confession is not repentance. Confession is an admission of guilt that occurs as repentance begins. A wife will write, "My husband is filled with remorse!" But remorse is not repentance. Remorse and sorrow continue because a person has not yet fully repented. Suffering, punishment, confession, remorse, and sorrow may sometimes accompany repentance, but they are not repentance...The meaning of repentance is not that people be punished, but rather that they change their lives so that God can help them escape eternal punishment and enter into his rest with joy and rejoicing. Theodore Burton, “The Meaning of Repentance,” Ensign, Aug. 1988, 7-8.. 

They coupled it with the teachings of John the Baptist, the prophet of repentance. repentance is to prepare the way of the Lord, it’s getting Jesus into your life. Sin pushes Him out of your life, repentance brings Him back. I loved that. It’s not just the steps of penitence that are repentance, although they certainly can be part of repenting. True repentance is being in a place where you can be with God.

Progression

Today was the first day of school for the grands! Tatum is in 7th grade, she said her orchestra is much bigger this year but they still only have 4 violas. Penny is in 4th grade and her first day “was awesome”, and Marshall is in 2nd and said it was just like 1st but he’s excited for math. 

The Johnson girls went to Dani’s and got to go to school pick up. Jenna had an appointment to check her goiter. That was one of two doctor appointments that I was anxious about for today. We have a family history of thyroid problems (thyroid cancer 1991) and I don’t want to see a repeat of that. 🙏🏼

Grace had her appointment with the therapist today as well. We talked to her after and she was optimistic and positive about the appointment 🙏🏼

Rob and I met with the design center and made some choices for the new house. It was fun and also stressful. After we went to Red Robin to unwind, I guess burgers and fries are the Mormon version of “a couple drinks” after work. 
 

Building

Senior band uniform try on. 

            Also pictures of Grace and her “babysitters”.

I am literally counting down the minutes until her appointment with the therapist because she is really struggling since school has started and she makes me nervous!

 We met with the builder and picked a lot and house plan. Now we build. Here’s the sad story. Rob and I often want different things in life. We want the same thing as far as: for each other to be happy, to raise happy & healthy kids, to follow Jesus. The important things. The other things though🤷‍♀️

Rob likes to stay up late. I like to go to bed early. He likes it cold, I like the summer and to be cozy. He is mathy and smart. I am not. He loves to fish, I think it’s cruel (unless you eat them.) He loves motorcycles & guns and I think they’re dangerous. I love Disney, he hates crowds & heat & spending tons of $$ (at Disney…hello $9 hot dog). I don’t put my head under the water, he is a fish. I’m a nervous flyer and he builds jets for a living. 

And for the house. He wanted to move. I did not. I want to live in Leonardtown side by side with my next door neighbor and in the same ward as all our friends. He wants land and a workshop. Enough room for his hobbies of wood turning, boat storing, and archery, and to be close to work. I wanted a neighborhood  pool. So we literally can not both have what we want. There’s no way to compromise. Someone had to decide to be happy with what the other one wants. So this time it’s me. And I am happy with it. The house is beautiful and the land is gorgeous. It’ll be a bit longer drive to everywhere we want to go and I’ll have to make new friends …or not. I’ll have those dumb cats to be friends with.

Ethan at a leadership meeting with the new mission president. Love a surprise photo!