dystopia

Our life is so surreal right now.  2020 has been a year of terrible things.

-Australia was on fire...is it out? I haven't even heard.

-the whole sperm donor thing...which really has been so crazy and upsetting in weird and unexpected ways.  Grace is now convinced that she is adopted or was switched at birth because she looks like Anna and Kenz and not like me and her siblings.  Also I have had a number of conversations with people who have faced similar situations and I believe complete transparency is the way to go.  But we all love our secrets don't we? (rhetorical)

-Andrea's health issues.  We have all been worried about her and are so grateful that her cancer has not returned.

-Covid 19 and the subsequent lock down of the nation whole world, shut down of the economy, and fire storm of conflicting expert advice, rise in unemployment, domestic violence, suicide, disruption of lives, loss of lives, loss of freedoms.

-Michael's struggles with addiction and joblessness and the sadness it brings to each of us who love him. 

-murder hornets

- and now racial tension is spiking.  George Lloyd's murder was terrible and senseless. 

With the hot summer months coming up I fear this is a the perfect recipe for disaster. People are bored, hot, not trusting of each other and have a lot of time on their hands.  I pray things settle down and that we've seen the end of the terrible times.

Which means I am praying that the Savior comes again quickly.

In more cheerful news Dani posted this cute photo last month.  Happy memories.  Also I look thin (which I am not) but maybe I could be?  talk about addictions! (head shakes sadly)

Yesterday Rob and I went on a date.  One of our stops was Ollies and I bought that cute red table cloth.  It's summery and fun!

We had book club last night and I really enjoyed seeing everyone and our talk.  We read "we crossed a bridge and it trembled" voices from Syria.  It was tragic and eye opening and our discussion was meaningful and important.

Today SpaceX is scheduled to launch.  It was scrubbed earlier in the week due to weather issues.  I hope it will go up today and I hope we will see it!

Also I think I'm not going to actually comment on  the whole Book of Mormon.  I am going to read it this summer, and maybe I'll mention thoughts I have from time to time but not each chapter. What was I thinking?

1 Nephi 11-14

Nephi's Vision
again, books could be written about these chapters alone. But today's thought:

right or wrong, God's way or Satan's, good or evil.
It seems like the world has a lot of gray in it.  A lot of wiggle room.  I think really it's simpler than that.  We either follow Jesus Christ, believe his words and belong to his fold....or we don't and no matter how we sweeten it up that means we belong to Satan.

Luckily His invitation of Come Unto Me is to all, and His blood atoned for all, and His love is there for all.  We just have to make sure we are taking advantage of it.

1 Nephi 10

17 And it came to pass after I, Nephi, having heard all the ^awords of my father, concerning the things which he saw in a ^bvision, and also the things which he spake by the power of the Holy Ghost, which power he received by faith on the Son of God—and the Son of God was the ^cMessiah who should come—I, Nephi, was ^ddesirous also that I might see, and hear, and know of these things, by the power of the ^eHoly Ghost, which is the ^fgift of God unto ^gall those who diligently seek him, as well in times of ^hold as in the time that he should manifest himself unto the children of men.

18 For he is the ^asame yesterday, today, and forever; and the way is prepared for all men from the foundation of the world, if it so be that they repent and come unto him.

19 For he that diligently ^aseeketh shall find; and the ^bmysteriesof God shall be unfolded unto them, by the power of the ^cHoly Ghost, as well in these times as in times of old, and as well in times of old as in times to come; wherefore, the ^dcourse of the Lord is one eternal round.

Some of my favorite verses in the Book of Mormon, an invitation to come and see for yourself.  We can each, and not only can we but we must each, seek to know God's truths.  And he will reveal himself to any of His children who earnestly seek.  I don't mean he will physically appear to us but that we can feel His presence and we can be taught truths by the power of the Holy Ghost.  

1 Nephi 9

the Lord hath commanded me to make these plates (insert any other commandment) for a wise purpose in him, which purpose I know not.

God knows.  We do not.  It's a simple message.  We keep the commandments because of faith, hope and love not knowledge.

1 Nephi 8

This chapter is the beginning of Lehi's great vision of the Tree of Life.  It's one that all primary children know, it's right in the beginning of the Book of Mormon where even the most casual of readers will find it, and it teaches many important lessons.  Probably books could be written about the lessons from that vision alone.  As I read it this time my mind was turned to a recent talk by our beloved prophet, President Russel M Nelson.  He spoke to us two years ago about the importance of personal revelation.  About how vital a personal relationship with the Holy Ghost was, and he taught us and begged us to make that a priority.  Much like clinging to the iron rod was the.only.way Lehi's family and the other people in his dream could reach the tree and partake of the fruit the only way we can survive spiritually is to likewise cling to the word of God.  We hear that word by reading the scriptures, and by personal revelation, and by listening to the prophet who receives revelation for all.

"In coming days, it will not be possible to survive spiritually without the guiding, directing, comforting, and constant influence of the Holy Ghost."
Russell M. Nelson prophet of God

an excerpt from that talk:

"In like manner, what will your seeking open for you? What wisdom do you lack? What do you feel an urgent need to know or understand? Follow the example of the Prophet Joseph. Find a quiet place where you can regularly go. Humble yourself before God. Pour out your heart to your Heavenly Father. Turn to Him for answers and for comfort.

Pray in the name of Jesus Christ about your concerns, your fears, your weaknesses—yes, the very longings of your heart. And then listen! Write the thoughts that come to your mind. Record your feelings and follow through with actions that you are prompted to take. As you repeat this process day after day, month after month, year after year, you will “grow into the principle of revelation.”⁹

Does God really want to speak to you? Yes! “As well might man stretch forth his puny arm to stop the Missouri river in its decreed course … as to hinder the Almighty from pouring down knowledge from heaven upon the heads of the Latter-day Saints.”¹⁰

You don’t have to wonder about what is true.¹¹ You do not have to wonder whom you can safely trust. Through personal revelation, you can receive your own witness that the Book of Mormon is the word of God, that Joseph Smith is a prophet, and that this is the Lord’s Church. Regardless of what others may say or do, no one can ever take away a witness borne to your heart and mind about what is true."

1 Nephi 7

The importance of maintaining a soft heart.

Often times the family of Lehi, and the family of Ismael, felt the softening influence of the Holy Ghost which lead them to turn away from their desires and follow the Lord.  In the case of Nephi's brothers they also, often, saw angels and received messages from them.  This caused all of them to do what was right...but it didn't cause all to keep doing what was right.

What is the difference?  How do you maintain a soft heart and desire to choose the right?  That's one of the things we need to learn, practice, and eventually perfect in our lives.  We have to keep doing what's right even after the moment of decision or exhortation has passed.  We have to remember the things we are taught and the things we know and press forward with that as our compass.

This chapter doesn't say how we do that but we know the primary answers, which are the pure and simple doctrines of the gospel.  Pray daily and often, read and study, obey the commandments, be humble, make and keep sacred covenants, serve others, and never, ever, ever, lose sight of that.

Fun picture Hannah took of Sawyer the other day, she is a talented photographer.  I love the way the fire looks.

1 Nephi 6

take away: write the things that are pleasing to God.

And you could extrapolate: talk of things that are pleasing to God, think of things that are pleasing to Him, do things that are pleasing to Him, in all aspects of life have that be your focus.

When I was a girl I wished I could grow up to be a nun.  I wanted to spend all my life serving God. I wanted to work out with the people, where they were poor and to help them.  I didn't know this term but I definitely wanted to be "the bride of Christ".   Of course I wasn't catholic so that is problem #1. Also our understanding of our purpose in life is much bigger than that.  We are privileged to come to Earth, get  a body, and to become like God.  Motherhood and marriage are a holy, sacred part of that process and one that I am so grateful to be able to participate in.  I know that not everyone who desires that gets blessed with it in this lifetime, I also know that our loving Heavenly Father withholds no good gift from His righteous children and He will recompense our losses in the eternities. But for me I have been able to walk that path.  I have 6 beautiful children who are my joy.  I have married two men and have learned a lot from each of those marriages.  I look forward to an eternity of joy with my husband and our posterity, and with my parents and siblings and ancestors.  Those relationships are the foundation of who I am.  I believe family relationships are the most rewarding and the most difficult of all our human interactions.  It is easy to serve strangers, sometimes it is much harder to serve the people we live with.  Dad told me that the most Christlike service we would ever give was in our own families.  We extend grace and mercy when we forgive the inevitable trespasses and wrongs that happen.  We lift our family members as we grow together, share together, fight and then forgive each other, and learn to think kindly and act kindly with each other. That process pleases God.

Also how cute are these grandchildren of mine!!  Dani took them all to the reservoir yesterday and they had a fun day!  Tatum did say it was too hot, just wait until she arrives in Florida in a couple of weeks!

1 Nephi 5

The idea of sacrifice is an interesting one. Biblically there was a lot of ritual and specific requirements surrounding sacrifice. I’m some ways I think it may have been easier, at least it was more straightforward. If you have a baby you go to the temple and offer a sacrifice in thanks. If you need to make a sim offering you get two turtle doves or a kid or whatever is specified and you make a sacrifice. So there you go.

Today we don’t sacrifice by the shedding of blood. The sacrifice the Lord wants is that if a broken heart and a contrite spirit. What does that look like?
I think it looks like humility. It looks like serving others. It looks like doing what the Lord wants, not what you want. It looks like being patient and cheerful and selflessly.

We sacrifice a lot but we get back a whole lot more.

1 Nephi 4

The Lord knew it was important for his children to read his words. So important that he sent them all the way back to Jerusalem and into mortal danger to retrieve them.

Nephi was so happy to have them because he knew his children would dwindle in unbelief without them.

Lesson: do I make reading the scriptures this level of priority? I don’t have to risk my life, or travel across a desert to get them. But I need to give them that same level of devotion.

Victor E Lap

That’s the school mascot: Victor E Wolverine. The parents had banners made and hung them on the fence line around the student parking lot yesterday.  Tonight we came back to the school. Lots of teachers and staff stood out in the rain and waved and cheered as the seniors made their loop around the lot. Everyone went all out! It was for seniors but it was also awesome for their families and for the teachers and staff. It was nice to mark the occasion.

After we went with the Roddy’s to Gators.

1 Nephi 3

As I read this chapter several phrases popped.  Things that made me see Nephi's character.

1. he exhorts and encourages his brothers.  As a parent we need to teach, guide, instill, reprove, redirect,  and exhort our children so they can know what they should do.  We also need to cheer, help, reward, walk alongside of, point out the strengths of and provide opportunities to our children, or in other words encourage.

2. thou shalt be favored of the Lord because though has not murmured.  It is human nature to feel overwhelmed and discouraged and to think that what we are being asked to do is hard (or impossible) and that's okay.  But if we can feel that and then turn to the Lord with trust and do it anyway, with out murmuring we will be favored.

3. faithful in keeping the commandments of the Lord.  That's a work in progress isn't it?

4.  trade the things of the world for the things of God.  The brothers literally tried to trade their wealth for the plates.  They also actually walked away from their wealth and possessions and position to follow the prophet (their father) into the wilderness.  We too are asked to trade the things of the world for the things of God.  We don't have to leave our stuff but we do have to value it less than we value God and His children.  We have to give in our abundance, and in our want.  We have to leave our entertainment and go to the temple. We have to turn off the TV and open up the scriptures.  We have to put aside our hobbies and spend time building our families, and walking the straight and narrow path with them.  We have to give our time to help and serve others, our money to tithe and build the kingdom of God, or talents to encourage and cheer and teach others.  We need to wear out our lives in the service of our God.

1 Nephi 2

Nephi was young, but he wanted to know the mysteries of God.  He wanted to believe and to serve.  So he prayed and God answered him.  Age doesn't matter when it comes to seeking the Lord.  If we are young and think we have little to offer, no wisdom to share, that no one will listen to us, if we think that God doesn't have time for us because he is busy working with people who are better prepared or more accomplished...well that's just not true.  Seeking Him early (in the day, and in life) is wonderful and amazing and He will answer and teach and direct you.  Look at Nephi.

And what about if we are old, and feel like we are irrelevant and have missed the boat.  Well that's not true either.  The Lord is always there with open arms and will teach you and direct you and help you to change and be more like Him, and you can be an agent for change in other's lives as well.  Which is even more rewarding.  Sharing the good news is the natural desire of a disciple's heart, with our families and children and loved ones, and with friends and strangers and enemies.  We are never to old, or frail, or out of touch to do that.

And what if we are in between.  The sweet spot where you "should be" vigorous and productive, wise and stalwart.  What if you are there and you don't think you are those things and that you aren't good enough?  Well, that's not true either.  We are each good enough.  All the Lord asks is that we give Him our hearts.  He will teach us right where we are, He will come to us right where we are, He will lift us right where we are, and He loves us right where we are, and where we were, and where we will be.

Oh how I love my God, and my Savior, Jesus Christ.  What goodness and mercy is ours to be received.  It's incredible.

1 Nephi 1

This summer the stake youth leaders issued a challenge.  All the youth, and all the leaders will read the Book of Mormon, from cover to cover.  We started on Monday and will finish right before school starts.  I am super excited.  I am excited because I love the read the Book of Mormon in "x" amount of time challenge, I always get so much out of it.  I think the girls will get a lot of out it.  I hope and pray that my Grace gets a lot out of it.  She is a good, great, smart girl.  I want her testimony and her love of the Book of Mormon and the Gospel of Jesus Christ to also be good and great and powerful.

So, for myself, to add a little something to the challenge I am going to write just a short paragraph about what I learned from this particular reading of the Book of Mormon this summer.  There are so many lessons and insights and inspirations in the pages of that sacred text and I am not even going to try to capture it all.  But I do want to capture a thought from each one. 

Nephi writes a record.  Page one, introductory paragraph we are told that it is, in part, an account of their sufferings. That popped out to me.  I have long been a believer that it is our trials and our adversities that make us who we are, that shape our characters and prove our faith.  We should expect hard things, and in fact every one has a lot of hard hard things in their lives.  Some seemingly more than others but that is in God's hands.  When we are in the midst of our trails do we turn to God in prayer? Do we patiently endure and act in obedience?
We also have a lot of good and joyful things in our lives and that too proves us.  Do we remain steadfast and faithful when the road is easy and times are happy? Do we share of our abundance? Do we grow and stock up our spiritual oil so that we can have a reserve in hard time?

Despite this very core belief of mine I still don't like the trials and fear the ones to come.  I still cling to what I think is best and how I want to find happiness. The Lord must look at me with a smile on His face as he shakes His head and says trust me, it's going to be better, this is part of my plan for you daughter.  Like a parent with a willful child who doesn't see the end from the beginning.

Anyway, those words an account of their sufferings popped out to me and I said, yes.  That is why we are here.  Not to suffer exactly but to learn and grow and that is the vehicle and important to remember and to learn and to grow from.

So what did I learn from my suffering, from Nephi's sufferening.  Today, in that moment?  Well in Chapter 1, the summary it says "-He praises God".  It is a record of Nephi's suffering and he praises God.  That is my lesson this day from Chapter 1.  Praise be to God.  I want to praise Him too.  I want to be ever grateful.  And I am, that's something I am good at.  So I will Praise Him for giving me an eye to see what is good in my life and in the world.  And I will work on being great at it..instead of good at it ;)

Memorial Day Weekend

Saturday: Rob and I had some errands to run in the morning. We actually had a fun time doing that. Grace had a clarinet lessons. She also went driving with her dad for about an hour. Rob went fishing in the afternoon and that’s about it.

Sunday: Rob and Jon are friends. They spend a lot of time fishing and standing in each other’s garages doing “stuff”. They have been together a lot during quarantine so we decided our germs were well mingled and we invited the whole family over for dinner. We spent a couple hours playing games, we did come Follow Me together, we ate a delicious dinner and enjoyed each other’s company. It was really nice to be with friends. I only took one picture, Grace and Sam playing tenzi. Their family hadn’t heard of it and we enjoyed playing several versions and now they want to buy it too.

Monday: it’s raining, and will continue to rain for a few days.

Friday night

Ethan is healing well, not nearly as quickly as he would like though. He has chipmunk cheeks and can’t eat anything hard. This weekend the priests are going to the beach with Zach’s parents and we were hopeful that E could go. Sadly he isn’t ready for that kind of fun:(. I did suggest we plan a similar outing for his birthday, and I was a little surprised but he didn’t say no, so maybe that will work out!  He’ll be 18 in one month so we can plan something if he wants.

Tonight Rob and I had our first date night since quarantine started. Disney Springs had a partial opening and we decided to go. Masks are required. So a couple things:

1. It was so fun to go out!

2. One of my favorite restaurants, the Polite Pig, was open and I had read they had a new menu item, Shrimp and Grits. We went there and I had that, and it was as good as I had hoped. Plus I had the Brussels sprouts, which are my favorite, and Diet Coke.  Yumm Yumm. 

3. It rained and was really empty and everyone had masks on so that was strange. 

4. Rob complained. 

*There are many, varied, and divisive opinions on the whole pandemic. Honestly I don’t know. Experts give contradictory counsel. Facts seem to be interpreted thru widely different lenses and people have strong opinions and fears (that are valid) on all sides of the debates. I know a few things a) God is in charge and therefore it will be okay. b) the prophet said to shelter and to pause and to be home and I follow him. c) now that we can go out we should be kind. If you want to wear a mask do, if you don’t and the place you are going doesn’t require it..then don’t. d) I don’t like wearing masks but I did want to go to DS (where they are required). So I had a choice. I could not wear a mask and go somewhere else (a good and fine choice) or I could go there and abide by their rules (also a fine choice) I was not forced to go, or not to go, or to wear a mask or not. Obviously we went and I enjoyed our outing. It’s not like pre-pandemic and I don’t know if it ever will be. I don’t know. I do know we have to stop attacking each other and feeling superior in our opinions.  A little kindness is easy to muster and goes a long way. 

This dog is as big as his girl. She spends her time playing the clarinet, finishing school and helping others with school and clarinet on FaceTime. 

Dani is enjoying school and it’s so fun to hear about her classes and her work. I can’t wait to see this dude! We sent him a little gift bag since he doesn’t get to fly here with the girls next month.

When I was driving home from work today I was talking to Hannah and she told me that she was outside watching Yoshi frolicking in the sprinklers only I thought she said she and Yoshi were...which made a funny picture in my head. After I got home I quickly drew it for her and texted it so we could laugh about it. Also great news the doctor thing worked out and she’s now happy with the care she is getting!  Yay!!

With no students at school we have some free time each day. Today I looked up Russian Impressionist art (as one would) and spent a lot of time looking at it. I really enjoyed some of it. Nikolai Bogdanov-Belsky was my fav of the day. This picture reminded me of chaperoning Ethan’s class trip to Elms Beach where we were supposed to keep the kids dry and my whole group “fell in the water” lol.

I also listened to a podcast about Mary Magdalene that was super interesting and read Joseph and Emma Smith’s patriarchal blessings on line and looked up recipes. 

Wisdom teeth

Ethan had his wisdom teeth extracted today. It went well. He was not at all worried. I was a little nervous I don't now why.  I don't remember if I was when the girls got theirs out or not but this time I was.  Maybe I am a little apprehensive about him leaving for who knows where for 2 years.  I want him to go, of course. And we have been planning on this for his whole life but a teeny tiny part of me is worried about it.  He's ready.  I'm not. Anyway the surgery went well and I got him home and to bed safely.  After a short nap he woke up feeling pretty good.  Tonight he has Jackson over playing video games. He requested Planet Smoothie for dinner, which of course I obliged. And now we just let him heal. 

I did take a couple videos, per his request after he was waking up and still loopy.  Before he said not to and then while he was waking up he thought he was pretty funny so he asked me to film him and he asked to FaceTime his sisters. Some of the funniest bits were when he told me that Vincent VanGoh did a lot of his best work while under the influence of drugs so he, Ethan, was hoping that he would have a similar experience and wake up knowing the cure to cancer or something.  He was very disappointed and thought he was actually waking up stupider. Then he asked me to ask him a hard question to check, maybe a hard math problem.  After a second he said, oh no mom you don't know any hard math problems.  I agreed and suggested he ask himself a problem and then answer it.  Which he did. 

He also asked, several times, what I thought the biggest problem with western civilization was. He thinks it's that people are selfish and only think about themselves.  And he spent a lot of time marveling about how his face was numb, his vision was double and things looked funny.  He also thought it was a great idea that he wasn't driving home because we wouldn't have made it. He was right, he was pretty funny.

Grace went to the beach with some friends.  They had a great time and came home pink and sandy.

Filter

After work Ethan and I went to the doctor. He had his follow-up and paperwork pick up appointment. We were there a long time, 2 hours actually. We weren’t mad because the world is upside down Covid crazy and health care workers are heroes. So I played with filters and made some favorite photos into digital art. It was fun.  The above photo is Lincoln at Epcot, back when we went to Epcot. I don’t know how the parks will be able to open and keep social distancing protocols. 

Hannah and Sawyer’s baby announcement photo. That was a happy and exciting day!

Ethan’s first 🎃!

Our sweet Grace. Just about done with her freshman year!

Sawyer🐙🐙

The Johnson Family

Me and Sierra

At the doctor.

Sunday

I woke up this morning to this happy news! My handsome nephew, Tanner, proposed to Breanna last night. And she said yes!! So exciting! They are so cute! I can’t wait to see them sealed for Time and All Eternity.

I had ward council this morning. Immediately after Grace and I spent some time indexing. Then she wanted to go driving. I have been hesitant but I took her and we drove for about an hour and she did quite well so I was pleased with that promising start. 

We came home and I made cookies then we had a sweet church at home meeting. 

Sierra has gone on some dates with a cute boy named Mitchell. He came over for dinner and spent the evening. He’s nice. She leaves tomorrow, he leaves on his mission in one week (he is a little older than most new missionaries) so that is that but she’s had fun and they’ve explored some different springs and enjoyed each other’s company. I think it made Covid a little nicer for her. I took a picture, because I always love to. Hopefully once she gets to Utah she’ll meet someone fabulous and get married. (Said Mrs Bennett)

Indian Rocks

We spent the day at the beach and it was lovely. The kids didn’t want to come, which is sad.

Originally we thought we’d go to Cocoa but the Atlantic is brewing up a storm so we went gulf side. Clearwater was to capacity so kept driving along the shore line looking for a spot.  Eventually we found parking and a lovely lovely beach.

We had a lot of fun. We talked about all the things, swam together, sat in the sand together. 

On the way home we stopped at Culver’s and got burgers and concrete mixers and sat outside on the patio drying off and eating. 

I’d say it was a perfect day. 

So there you go

I guess that’s something I say a lot. Why? I guess I tend to accept things the way they are, and to try to make the best of any situation that I find myself in.  Sometimes it’s easy, sometimes it’s not so easy. At the end of the day there are many things out of my control, out of anyone’s I suppose. Part of life is learning how to deal with lots of things out of your control, deciding how you will feel about them, how you will react, how you will move forward. 

Right now everyone is dealing with things they don’t like, didn’t want, and can’t control. Hannah and Sawyer are preparing to bring Ezra earth side, and trying to get thru school. They pictured doing this from their apartment in Idaho, living in their apartment, hanging out with friends, going to class, with the midwife that Hannah loves. Instead they are doing virtual learning, having a hard time finding a doctor they like, and gratefully living with Sawyer’s awesome parents. I hope they are back to Idaho in the fall and that Hannah can walk when she receives her diploma, and a good job comes her way. These things are unknown though and they are handling it cheerfully and very optimistically.  So there you go. 

Dani has started back to college. She has been looking forward to this day and planning on it for awhile. She too pictured going to class. While her children also went to school. Instead they all are at home doing school together. She’s still excited and the kids are doing well. Yesterday I enjoyed seeing Tatum’s super cute book report and today I loved talking with D and T about her first week and her assignments. College is a lot of fun. Thankfully Greg is an essential employee and they have been doing well. So there you go.

Ethan. Poor kid. Born 9 months post 9-11. Never attended a single school for more than 2 years. Started his senior year with a hurricane that shut the state down and ended it in a pandemic! What!! Thru all that he’s been cheerful and calm. He’s been an excellent student. Now he’s preparing for 7 AP tests by himself. Preparing to serve the Lord on a mission in the middle of a world that is confused and crazy and who knows what that mission will look like. And preparing to enter adulthood where I am sure he will be certain, despite the uncertainties around him. So there you go.

Sierra. Came to Florida to find a new life. Instead she found a crazy 3 month lock down. Now she’s going back to Utah and I will miss her. It’s been a delight to have her here. To spend time, play games, talk, wait for the world to be “normal” together. 

Grace. So there you go. She struggles with EDS and snarkyness. She misses going to school. Going to band. Hanging out with friends. She wonders what next year will look like. What adjustments will be made to her plans and dreams. She is a dreamer and a planner and she is strong. 

Clayna. :) They are both working, raising their red headed spit fires, looking for a house, planning for their family. I feel like they are doing great, they are a little calm in the middle of chaos. Not to say it’s easy or problem free or stress free. They’ve just hit a good stride and you have to be grateful for that. It’s the ebb and flow in life. Sometimes things are a little easy and sunny. Sometimes they are stormy and dark. Sometimes in the middle. And we all have all those parts. So there you go:)

And Rob and I. We get older. We plan for a future, retirement, our own missions. We wish we could live near our children and grandchildren. That’s not the case right now, but maybe some day. We deal with surprises and disappointments, and trials and joys. Like everyone. We plan and things go the way we hoped, or not. And we look forward with hope, with faith, with a little trepidation at times. 

So there you go.

50

Life’s big events keep happening. Covid or no Covid. Today is Rob’s 50th birthday. We had always kind of thought about doing something big ...but. 

We did our best to make it a special. We went to Yellow Dog for dinner, his favorite. It was so weird to all be out together, I think it’s literally the first time since quarantine that we have all been out. I bet the dogs were wondering what was happening! I think dinner was fun. Everyone was chatty and the food was good. 

Side note: look at that hair. Today I took Ethan to the oral surgeon who was super nice. He was recommended to us by Andy Gooch and we loved him. He was so friendly and he told us he would only charge us what the insurance would pay since Ethan was going to be leaving on a two year mission. He said that was so admirable and that was his contribution + the “family discount” thanks to Andy. I was so touched and thought it was the nicest nicest thing.

Back to the party: we got home and had a scheduled zoom party. All the kids and Nana and Abba joined us. Everyone made a dessert to have in their own home and we sang and ate and talked. Rob opened his gifts and it was fun to see the whole family together. It was a little awkward, as zoom often is, but I think it still was fun!

After our call the birthday boy went fishing and that was it. 

Mother's Day

Today was a nice mother's day.  I do miss going to church on Sunday but home church is also nice.  This morning I was the first one up.  The dogs and I went on a walk.  We were expecting rain for the whole day and while it wasn't raining while we walked you could tell it was coming.  When I got home I sat in the backyard for a long time enjoying the morning. 

Sierra made me delicious paleo banana pancakes for breakfast. 

The girls got me an artisan pitcher and glasses set that I wanted and Ethan drew me a beautiful jelly fish picture.  I talked to all the kids and there were texts going back and forth between my sisters and SILs and moms and even some friends who are moms.  

Our ward made several very nice videos that they sent out.  One was a virtual choir of moms and primary children.  They sang "Mother, Tell Me A Story" and it was so beautiful.  The youth made a very nice video too.  Both Ethan and Grace participated and that was very special.  Kayla Bushman, our primary president, recorded a message.  All of those things really made mothers day nice.

Rob and Sierra made dinner and our day was pleasant and calm.  We did Come Follow Me and went to bed early.

Being a mother is my favorite.  It means the world to me and brings me such joy and happiness.  I have always loved being a mom.  There were hard times of course, and times that felt overwhelming and tedious but I can honestly say I have loved it.  The only thing better is being a grandmother and that's because you get to do that with your daughters!  No one loves babies and kids more than moms and grandmas!